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Tips for Settling Your Divorce

We all know that divorce can take a long time and can be expensive. You and your spouse can have your resources drained and end the process exhausted, both emotionally and financially. Luckily divorce does not have to end that way. Most divorces end in settlement, and it is easy to understand why once you are in the middle of a divorce case. No one wants a long, drawn out case, and it is better for you and your spouse if you can come to an agreement.

A settlement will let you help make big decisions about your future. Decisions like who will pay which debt, who will the kids live with, and what will happen to the house, for example, are all decisions that can be made by settling. Having a good settlement will let you keep some control over your divorce and your life. For many divorcing couples, coming to a settlement agreement is the best and quickest way to end a divorce.

Resolving your divorce through mediation is a tried and true method of resolving all of the issues in your divorce. A mediator is a neutral third party who helps guide you through the process and get to a final agreement.

Collaborative divorce is another excellent solution. Collaborative divorce lets both you and your spouse have specially-trained attorneys along with other family law professionals all come together and hammer out a settlement agreement that works for your family. Even if you and your spouse don’t find common ground on all the issues, mediation or collaborative divorce can help you and your spouse learn to communicate in a more peaceful way.

Keeping a cool head is very important. Divorce is definitely a tough time and emotions run high, but try your hardest not to get angry when you are discussing divorce issues with your spouse. Anger will not solve the over-all problems and will probably just hurt your chances of getting to a final settlement. Sometimes this may mean stepping away from a conversation and taking time to cool down. Divorce is a long process, and making snap decisions is not a good idea, especially if you are making decisions or comments in the heat of the moment.

Try to remember that divorce is a marathon, not a sprint. The legal process is long and takes time. Even the shortest of cases are measured in months and not days. Don’t feel like you have to rush into a settlement and get things done right away. Your divorce decree may affect your life for many years to come. This is especially true when you and your spouse have children together. Think through your issues and goals, and review any settlement offer with your lawyer before making any decisions.

Finally, try to make good decisions about your line in the sand, and what issues are truly important to you. Getting the sofa or an end table may seem really vital to you right now, but remember that for what you pay your lawyer to fight your spouse over a piece of furniture, you could probably buy a new piece of furniture. Keeping in mind the things and issues that are actually important – things like child custody or long term financial decisions – will help guide you on what is worth sacrificing and what is worth standing your ground on.

Our attorneys are trained in all methods of dispute resolution, including collaborative divorce. We have extensive experience in guiding clients to a settlement that helps them in their future life. Contact us today at (253) 272-9459 for an appointment.

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